How To Not Lose Control When Life Is Out Of Control
In his youthful days, King David possessed a Midas touch, and every endeavor he undertook seemed to turn to gold. He was reminiscent of a contemporary pop sensation, much like Justin Bieber. However, the winds of change blew abruptly, and this triumphant figure soon found himself entangled in a whirlwind of adversity. The hero had transformed into a perceived zero. King Saul, consumed by an evil spirit, relentlessly pursued David, attempting to assassinate him on numerous occasions. Saul even dispatched his elite forces to track down the fugitive. Thus began David's decade-long odyssey—life on the run—as he sought to escape the unjust wrath of a man who once held him dear.
Neglect and disregard plagued David's early life. When the prophet Samuel arrived to anoint the future king, David's own father failed to consider him a contender. Despite his merits, David had his share of trials, enduring both familial and royal maltreatment. Yet, amid the cruelty he faced, David navigated a path of resilience.
The question arises: how does one maintain composure when life spirals into chaos? An incident in I Samuel 24 offers a glimpse into David's character. Saul unwittingly entered a cave to relieve himself, unaware that David's loyal men were concealed within. Given Saul's hostility, David could have easily succumbed to anger and vengeance. But he chose restraint. Saul's persistent harassment caused David untold misery, but he could not steal his self-control.
What was David's secret? He shielded his energy and retained dominion over his life. Instead of succumbing to negativity, David chose to bless his enemies, a lesson taught in the teachings of Jesus. This "blessing" entails speaking well of one's adversaries. Thus, David upheld his spiritual alignment with God and himself, even amidst dire circumstances.
In another instance, David chanced upon Saul, defenseless in slumber. While his men urged lethal action, David merely trimmed a piece of Saul's robe before leaving. This humble act symbolized David's plea for mercy. “I could have taken your life," David conveyed, "but I chose compassion. May divine judgment prevail between us.”
Despite Saul's failure to extend forgiveness, David consistently chose forgiveness for himself. This echoed the sentiments of Jesus on the cross, who implored, “Father, forgive them.”
David's daily practice of forgiveness was a safeguard, preventing Saul from infiltrating his spirit. David's ultimate triumph was the power to prevent external scars from scarring his inner landscape. This principle resonates with our own experiences of trauma.
The life of King David offers a lesson in unwavering resilience. From the heights of glory to the depths of suffering, David's ability to maintain self-control, bless his enemies, and extend forgiveness stands as a testament to the triumph of the human spirit.
We must not allow the scars of someone else to ruin our lives. I know some of you have had traumatic experiences, as have I. We must decide whether to let those years incapacitate us or allow those scars to etch a portrait of beauty and love. I have always loved the story of Lee Ezell as a great example to us all.
Lee Ezell was raised in Philadelphia’s inner city in a home where both parents were alcoholics. Being battered and abused, several domestic violence calls to the police a year were the norm. Religion was not a part of her upbringing, but one night she saw an ad for a Billy Graham crusade and decided to go. By the night's end, she had tearfully prayed the simple prayer.
At first, she thought this would solve everything, but she discovered that her abusive home’s conditions had not changed. She began to learn that God is not a fairy godfather in the sky who waves His magic wand and makes everything comfortable for His children. But she kept believing in Him.
After graduating high school at 17, she moved to San Francisco with her mother and two little sisters and started her first job as a typist. One morning, she met a salesman at work, and he brutally raped her that night. Believing that she was a loser and this was why it had happened to her, she told herself that she would go to her grave with this secret and not let anyone know what had happened.
Eventually, she discovered she was pregnant from this assault, and her friend offered to take her to Mexico for an abortion. On the way to Mexico, each night, she would read the Gideon Bible she would find in the drawer of the hotel room. She realized that abortion was too permanent an answer for a temporary problem and changed her mind. She chose, instead, to give up her child for adoption.
During the ensuing years, Lee met and married her husband, Hal, a widower with two daughters, and settled into living her life. Hal knew what had happened to Lee and periodically encouraged her to search for her birth daughter. But she did not.
Twenty years later, Lee received an unexpected phone call that reunited her and her daughter Julie. Julie had two motivations for looking for Lee: to let her know she was a grandmother, and her second motivation was to lead Lee to Christ, which she tried to do over the phone. Lee was thrilled to tell Julie she had found Christ many years ago and discovered that God is just, although life is not fair.
Today, Lee and Julie share their story of turning pain into victory. Julie says of her mother, "Yes, I am the result of rape, but I am so glad I did not get the death penalty for my father’s crime! After all, it doesn’t matter how you begin in life, but what you become."
So, whether it's King David's old narrative or Lee Ezell's modern trip, they teach us one vital lesson: harsh times will come, but we can choose how we respond. We may be nice even when others are cruel, and we can transform our difficulties into something beautiful. Like these stories, our lives could leave a great legacy of courage and hope.
Thank you for reading. Please forward this to a friend or two. :-)
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