Become an Interesting Person
Making friends has never been a problem for me in my entire life. Some say it's a knack I have, some say it's my West Texas roots, but I think it's in my curiosity. I've always been curious about other people. I'm just like many people out there who love to people-watch. I can sit in a mall and entertain myself just by watching people walk by. I often wonder, "What made them want to buy shoes like that? Where did they get that haircut? Where did he get that shirt? I want to get me one like that."
I wonder what's happening in their souls because it's showing up on their faces. When you have curiosity about people, it will make you formulate questions. The right questions at the right time will begin to draw people out.
Have you ever met anyone who seemed more interesting than the average person? Some people are more interesting than others. And some people are just downright boring. What makes a person boring? Is when their number one subject is all about themselves. Boring people will not quit talking about themselves.
Have you ever talked with someone who could not stop thinking about themselves? You can see it on their face as you are talking. You know they can't wait for you to stop talking so that they can tell you a story about themselves. The older you get, the more stories you have. I find myself listening to people, and their conversations often spark two or three comparable incidents in my life. I often put those stories aside because they are about me. Who are these people trying to one-up you? I do not think that is always their intention, but you walk away feeling like they weren't listening to you; they wanted to talk about themselves.
Interesting people are interesting because they're interested in you. If you want to become interesting, be interested in other people. Genuinely interested. Here's how you do it: Start with a series of questions. Questions like, "How did you do that? Where do you come from? What do you do? What brings you your greatest joy? What causes you your greatest pain? You are now making yourself interesting because you are interested in someone other than yourself.
However, the greatest question you can ask is not about the what, the where, or the why. The greatest question is about the Who. When you are interested in getting to know who the person is as opposed to what they do, you have entered a different dimension, and now you are becoming more interesting to them in return. People are so much more than what they do or where they come from. There is someone (the Who) that you should be interested in getting to know.
You can't fake this stuff, either. You must be genuinely interested in other people. Simply put, become a student of other people. Not just what they do but who they are. They are human beings, not human "doings."
I promise that once you know who that person is, you will understand why they act the way they do, since you stuck around long enough to hear their stories of pain. Now you have become an interesting person to them because you have earned the right to be heard next time you have something to contribute to the conversation.
Thank you for reading and participating. Please forward this to a friend or two. :-)